Stance: Studies on the Family

Brigham Young University Student Journal

Category: Uncategorized (page 3 of 16)

Valentine’s Day Ideas for Everyone in Your Life

This Valentine’s Day we bring you ideas for showing love to everyone around you. You can make this love day extra special by giving more love to everyone in your life—from your Relief Society president to your mom. Happy Valentine’s Day from all of us here at Stance!


Relief Society President

As the Relief Society President blesses the lives of so many people, a stunning way to show love to her is to collect a note of appreciation from each person she blesses. The notes may then be assembled into a gigantic valentine from the whole ward. The way I have seen this done was each apartment in our ward got a cardstock paper to write the notes on. The papers were then collected, cut in different shapes, and pasted on a poster board with different colored papers next to each other, as far as that was possible. The results were so nice that it was even becoming of something related to the Relief Society.

Austin Tracy


Other people may always get the two of you confused, and you’ll get on each other’s nerves, but at the end of the day, your twin will be the one who has always (literally) been and will always be there for you. Show your love simply by listening to her or him or making the food. Laugh together about that one time you did something and your twin got so mad or that one time you two conspired together to switch places so that your parents would get back together. Talk about the time when you two went to the movies and were the only ones in the theater. Whatever you decide to do this Valentine’s Day, it’ll help the most constant person in your life— your twin—know that you love them.

– Monica Allen


Depending on age and personality, brothers can be tricky people to show love to. Mine is 16 and he doesn’t exactly live for spontaneous displays of sibling love and affection from his sister. That fact makes me thankful that I do have at least one day a year to feel justified in unabashedly showing my love for him whether he likes it or not! This Valentine’s Day I’m going to keep things simple and just send him a quick text telling him how much I love him. I mean after all, you can never tell someone you love them too many times as long as you mean it, right? A funny and cheesy (or perhaps sweet and sentimental) card containing a few carefully written favorite sibling memories is an even more thoughtful way to let a brother know you appreciate him. A little treat would be a nice accompaniment as well. As long as your brother knows you’re thinking of him, even small and simple gestures can go a long way in enriching that sibling bond. Reaching out at all counts for a lot.

-Samantha Bullock


Whether you call him “dad,” “father,” or your “old man,” you can show love to your father figure this year on Valentine’s Day. Here are three ideas:
1. Write a thank-you note, email, or text: He’ll be thrilled to hear from you and to feel your heartfelt love and appreciation. Consider relating a specific experience where following his example has brought success or happiness in your life.
2. Give him a call: He’ll love the chance to talk with you one-on-one, especially if being at college means you don’t get to see each other or talk to each other very often.
3. Ask for advice: He’ll feel flattered that you are coming to him with questions, and you’ll get some top-notch advice on whatever you ask about. The bond between you will only grow.
Best of luck to you as you show appreciation to your dad this Valentine’s Day!

-Tyler Averett


Valentine’s Day doesn’t just have to be about loving the people we know. It can be a great opportunity to do service and show a little Christlike love. Whether it’s volunteering to help refugees, helping at a homeless center, visiting people in hospice care, or even just smiling at people as you pass them on the street, Valentine’s Day can be a day that can bring you closer to God and help other people feel God’s love as well.

-Cassy Hulse


This year for Valentine’s Day, I want to reach out  to my grandmothers. These women have played a big role in my life, and I would love nothing more than to spend time with them next week. However, schedule conflicts don’t make that possible over these next few days. So instead, I have decided to send each of them a valentine. Reaching out doesn’t have to be big. Doing something simple can put a smile on someone’s face. I hope that my little notes will make their Valentine’s Days a bit brighter.

-Rebecca Cazanave

Grown-up Kids

Just because your children are grown and married doesn’t mean they don’t want to be loved in silly and fun ways. This year, surprise them with something new.  If they live close and have kids, show up with dinner for the kids and let the parents go out! Or invite them over for a valentine dinner complete with pink, heart-shaped pancakes with strawberries and whipped cream on top.  Another option (no matter where they live) is to write each of them a “love” letter. Tell them why they are precious to you, what great talents you see in them, or a favorite memory of a time spent with them. The key is show love to them when they aren’t expecting it.

-Phyllis Rosen


You may be best friends with your neighbors, or you may be practically strangers, but whatever your relationship with them, it’s always nice to show your love for the people that surround you. Give a little love this year by making a treat and ding-dong ditching it, or by cutting out hearts with nice messages on them to heart-attack their lawn. Giving service is a great way to show your love—I know that I tend to feel more loving when I step out of my comfort zone to love others.

-Cari Averett


During the Valentine season our thoughts of love and appreciation generally go straight for our immediate family, but what about our in-laws? In-laws also go to great lengths to make sure we feel loved and appreciated as if we were always a part of their family. Even a simple thank-you card dressed up as a valentine would mean the world to them. Give them a call along with your spouse and share your love and gratitude for all they do. Men, if you want to win some extra brownie points, you could even send your mother-in-law some flowers, chocolate, or whatever she likes!

-Elizabeth Hansen

Many husbands go all out picking flowers and chocolates for their wives, but they definitely need some love on Valentine’s Day too. Most men will appreciate a heartfelt card. Try to list all the things you love about your hubby. Can you think of 52? If you can, take a deck of cards and cover one side in colored paper. Write one thing you love about him on each card, punch holes in one corner, and put them on a big O-ring. He’ll love reading all the reasons why you love him. Everyone says that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach… so why not make him a nice candlelit dinner at home? You won’t have to worry about fighting the crowds at a fancy restaurant. After you eat, you can cuddle up to watch a romantic movie or look through your dating and wedding pictures. Whatever you decide to do this Valentine’s Day, focus on making him feel loved and it will be a special day for both of you.

-Mckenna Clarke

For all of you out there who have a very special girl you want to show some love to, I’ve got some tips. Maybe you don’t show appreciation to her very often, but Valentine’s Day is a great opportunity to make up for that! I’m not talking about your wife, girlfriend, crush, or friend. I’m not even talking about your mom (though definitely make sure to show her some love). I’m talking about your sister! I have two sisters myself, both in high school, and this Valentine’s Day, I’m hoping to show them some appreciation. Here’s some suggestions from ideas I’ve come up with:
  • Take her out to lunch. Valentine’s Day dates usually aren’t until about dinner time anyway, so lunch is great to spend some time with her before.
  • Take her out to dinner. Neither of you have dates that night? Doesn’t mean you have to be alone. Plus, I’m not sure there’s a better people watching opportunity than dinner time on Valentine’s Day, if you’re into that kind of thing.
  • Give her a call! This might take a little coordination if you live in different time zones, but everyone can make time for a quick call. You can make it even more special by using Skype or FaceTime.
  • Write her a card! You gave your entire class a valentine in elementary school, so why not write one up with a little candy for your sister? It’s quick, easy, cheap, and she’ll love a little note. You can either mail it or send an e-card, so distance doesn’t have to be an issue.

-Austin Stutz

Sure, Valentine’s Day is a day to show love to our family and romantic interests, but what about the people we live with? Friend or not, roommates hold a special place in our lives. After all, we share our bathrooms, our kitchen, our very home with them—and on Valentine’s Day we can share our love with them, too. Being their roommate, you have a special look into their lives and what makes them happy, so get creative and do something special! Clean the kitchen or upgrade that old, broken toaster or blender. Turn up the music and have a dance party or watch their favorite movie while eating chocolate hearts. Let them know you are grateful to have them in your life.

-Jess Olsen

Showing love to your mom on Valentine’s Day is easier when your family lives close. If you do happen to have this luxury, I suggest treating your mom to something special. Take her out to lunch or go for a long walk and talk—just the two of you. Think of all those years your mom spent changing your diapers, teaching you to walk, driving you to soccer practice, listening to your dating stories, or giving you advice on what to study, where to work, and how to find that special someone. Don’t you think you can find time to express your love for all your mom has done and continues to do for you? I am blessed to have a best friend for a mom. My mom is the first person I call when that cute guy asks me out and the first one to hear about my terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. Now, since I’m not from Utah and don’t have the convenience of being able to see my mom on Valentine’s Day, I put my mind to the task of finding ways to show love even from far away. Take the time to write a note to your mom expressing your appreciation for everything she has done for you, then mail it to her! Nothing will put a smile on her face more than getting a note from you in the mail. If you are looking for a last-minute idea you can send multiple text messages throughout the day or even, make a FaceTime call to her! You’d be surprised how a little thing goes a long way.

-Camille Baker

Home Teachers

There are three types of home teachers: the ones that pretend you don’t exist, the ones who visit only once a month to put a check on their to-do list, and the ones who go above and beyond their calling. Regardless of which type they are, treat your home teachers for Valentine’s Day! Make them a treat and deliver it their doors. Instead of waiting for them to ask how they can help you, ask how you can help them. Offer to make them dinner or clean their dishes. Performing acts of service is the greatest way to show love and appreciation. How will I show my love for my home teachers? I think homemade enchiladas sounds like a great idea! What will you do to show love this Valentine’s Day?

-Naomi Hurd

Harold B. Lee Library

The Harold B. Lee Library has been a part of Brigham Young University’s campus for decades. On top of providing a gateway to knowledge through its book collections, the library also has some fantastic exhibits. These exhibits change every few months, but they never fail to put some pennies in your knowledge bank.

One exhibit the library has going on right now is their Life in Happy Valley exhibit. It’s an insightful exhibit about the history of Utah County. It’s a great exhibit for a study break for students or a fun field trip for any little ones who want to know more about where they live. This particular exhibit ends this month, so make sure to check it out before they shut down.

If you don’t make it in time for this one, there are several others to check out now. You can see a list of the current exhibits here, and you can learn more about the Happy Valley exhibit here.

Happy exhibiting!

—Jazmin Cybulski, Stance

Bowls for Humanity

I know we often think about Christmas as the season of giving, but as Easter approaches, I’ve been feeling a greater need to follow the example of the One who gave His life for our happiness and well-being by giving back in whatever ways I can in this Easter season and forever after.

Friday, March 25, 2016, Utah County’s Food and Care Coalition is putting on their tenth annual Bowls for Humanity event.

Bowls for Humanity offers locally made pottery from students and professionals and invites the community to support programs offered for the homeless and low-income of Utah County.

It’s free admission, so the only thing you are paying for is the bowl and the soup and roll that come with it ($5 and up). It’s a great opportunity to give to those who are struggling, just as our Savior did and continues to do.

All the information for this event can be found here.

—Jazmin Cybulski, Stance

Women’s Day in Provo

International Women’s Day has been around since the early 1900’s, but it’s only been called to my attention in the past few weeks. Maybe I’ve just been living under a rock, or maybe the feminist outcry has been taken a little more seriously this year. I’m all for celebrating women, and Provo is too.

Courtesy of

Today, March 8, Provo is having a day-long celebration of women. There will be a bike ride, an art discussion, and a show at Velour this evening.

According to their website:

This event started as a city initiative to enhance the visibility of the women of Provo, promote leadership opportunities for women in our community, and provide opportunities for women to help one another. Our hope is that it will grow into a Provo tradition and become a part of our culture for years to come. ​

If you can’t make it to the earlier events, I would definitely try to make it to the later ones. I’m so proud of Provo and its decision to make this holiday such a part of their community.

#ProvoWomensDay all the way.

—Jazmin Cybulski, Stance

Museum of Art

I think as we get older a lot of us lose the intense sense of curiosity we had as children. (It really was a sort of sense with how natural it was.) That deep fascination with the world around us just kind of gets put on the back burner as we get older.

One of the ways I try to reignite this flame is by taking on an activity or a task that I don’t naturally think about doing. One such activity is going to an art museum whenever I get the chance.

I’m not an art enthusiast by any means, but once I get in the zone and flow of a museum, I could take in the pieces on display for hours. Sometimes it’s because I’m just taking the art in for myself, or it’s because I’m reading every single plaque to try and figure out what it is I’m supposed to be looking for in the piece in front of me.

If you’re looking to reignite that sixth sense within you, I would suggest taking a trip to the Museum of Art here at Brigham Young University. They have such an incredible array of exhibits and activities going on constantly that I’m sure you’ll end up finding some of that childhood fascination bringing itself back to life.

One event in particular that I always love going to is their Art After Dark night. Typically the first Friday of every month, Art After Dark is a free event in which you get to see a new exhibit at the museum, consume some good food, and even get some free entertainment (typically a live band). It’s a really great way to spend date night, family night, roommate night, or I-want-some-alone-time-but-I-don’t-want-to-seem-anti-social night.

Plus, their famously delicious Cafe is now open later on Fridays if you want to indulge your taste sense as well as that curiosity one I mentioned before.

Make sure to check out the MoA’s events page here.

Provo Library


One gem that seems to often be looked over in our community is the Provo City Library. It’s an incredible sight because of its beautiful architecture and rich history, but there is more to this historical site than just looks.

unnamedThe library holds awesome functions and events for anyone and everyone. They have monthly events for kids and teens and also have authors come and give lectures for the adults who want a little more literature-speak in their lives. They also have an exercise class at least once a month.


unnamed1This month their playing on the Valentine’s Day theme with a Valentine’s Ball on February 13 amongst their other fun activities. Make sure to check out their calendar here. There’s sure to be something for everyone in your family (I’m looking at that Tai Chi for Beginners class). I guarantee it.

—Jazmin Cybulski, Stance

More information for Provo Library events can be found here.

Empowered By His Love

family with Christ

“How bold one gets when one is sure of being loved.” —Sigmund Freud

Think about a time when you knew that you were loved. When someone makes the effort to put you first, you can be sure you are loved. You feel more courage and confident. Maybe someone went to great lengths to let you know that he or she loved you or maybe it was a simple. A touch, a word, a note, a gift, or an act of service. Remember how you felt? Loved!


Did you know there is someone that is ALWAYS willing to go to great lengths to show His love for you?

“Each is a beloved spirit son or daughter of heavenly parents, and, as such, each has a divine nature and destiny,” (“The Family: A Proclamation to The World”).

284339_10150253946073877_7247146_nWe are children of God. “The most powerful Being in the universe is the Father of your spirit. He knows you. He loves you with a perfect love” (“You Matter to Him,” President Dieter F. Uchtdorf). He is willing to put us first EVERY time because He loves us.

Because He loves us He has given us an opportunity to have an earthly experience during which we can learn to be more like Him. Including learning to love through serving and sacrificing.

Here are a few simple ideas to get started:

  • Make someone’s bed
  • Prepare a hot breakfast for someone
  • Write a note of appreciation
  • Hold a door open for someone
  • Offer to share your umbrella
  • Bake your favorite kind of cookies and give them away
  • Sincerely ask how someone is doing, then listen
  • Volunteer at a soup kitchen, shelter, or community center
  • Pray for someone by name
  • Share an inspiring quote
  • Smile



“The Family: A Proclamation to The World” teaches that we are children of Heavenly Parents and that we have the potential to become like Them. Start today. Start small. Empower someone with confidence by showing them how much you love them.

—Karee Brown, Stance

For more ideas of showing others your love for them check out this 14-day challenge.

Take the time to reflect on how you can further show your love and listen a few suggestions by Elder Holland in “How Do I Love Thee?”

Provo City Center Temple


If you’re in the Provo area, the place to see these days seems to be the new Provo City Center temple.

Constructed from the structure of the old tabernacle, the City Center temple holds an incredible wealth of history and seems to have the prospect of an incredible future ahead of it. A future that includes at least a million tickets sold for the Open House being held now until March 5, 2016.

0 (1)The Open House allows for the general public to enter the temple and have a look around of its gorgeous interior. It is also an opportunity to gain insight into the beliefs of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (better known as Mormons). People of all faiths are invited and welcome to attend. Once the Open House is over, the building will only be open to those within the church who have received special permission through an interview process.

0 (2)I had the opportunity last week to take a special tour of the temple that allowed me to see one of the sealing rooms (where marriages take place) as well as the bridal room (where brides get ready for the marriage ceremony). While it was an incredible experience, my view of the rest of the temple was limited as we walked to these two rooms. I had an itch to see more.

The Open House not only allows for you to see the gorgeous inside of the temple before it is closed to the general public, but there is also a section of the tour that gives special insight into the incredible history of the tabernacle/temple.
0 (3)
The temple’s Open House started on January 15, 2016 and will end March 5, 2016. Tickets are going fast, so make your reservations here today.

—Jazmin Cybulski, Stance

Labor and Delivery Hospital Tour

labor and delivery

“Visiting the place where you’re planning to give birth well before you deliver can help relieve some pre-birth anxiety and make your birthing more enjoyable.” —What to Expect

I have to agree with the above quote. My husband and I finally took our hospital tour a few weeks ago. I was 36 weeks pregnant. Pregnancy experts recommend taking the tour between week 30 and week 34 but better late than never, right?

With this being my first time being pregnant, I have had an understandable amount of hesitation and nerves in regards to labor. However, attending a hospital tour brought me a lot of peace of mind and reassurance. I was able to ask certain questions I had been wondering about and received answers from an experienced labor and delivery nurse. I loved the tour.

Also, I wanted some specific things with labor, such as keeping the baby in my room, having alone time with the baby after birth, and breastfeeding right away instead of bottle-feeding. Taking the tour showed me that the hospital actually suggested those procedures instead of other methods, such as taking the baby out of the room. Knowing the hospital’s typical methods greatly reassured me and helped me become more excited for delivery day (“D-Day”).

There are many benefits to hospital tours! Whether you are an expecting mom, expecting dad, or just a curious daydreamer, I highly recommend reading this article by What To Expect:

—Lexi Foster

All About Family



Gordon B. Hinckley presented The Family: A Proclamation to the World over twenty years ago. While members of the Church thought it was an inspired document then it has only become more needed to guide to the members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as the world’s view of the family is changing.

I grew up learning about how the family is ordained of God and how it is central to the creator’s plan of happiness. My mom, like many mothers, taught me about the role of being a daughter and taught me skills to be a wife and mother later. Here I am, without children and single, but it doesn’t mean the principles of the proclamation don’t apply to me.

“Life rarely goes exactly according to plan for anyone,” said Bonnie Oscarson in a recent talk in General Conference, “and we are very aware that not all [men and] women are experiencing what the proclamation describes.”

We are all at 281804_10150253954418877_5965564_ndifferent points in our lives and yet the proclamation is still applicable to each of us. You may be single like me, a grandparent, a single parent, or happily married with children. No matter where we are or what our current family setting looks like, we have been told that the doctrine and principles taught in the proclamation apply to each of us. You are part of a family. God’s family. And you have a role and a responsibility in that family.

My weekly posts will review the proclamation in parts and give suggestions of how we can apply it to our lives at different points of our lives. These will just be suggestions because how you use the guide of the proclamation is personal to each person and sensitive to each unique situation, but hopefully it will help create a sense of urgency in learning the doctrines and applying the principles. So that each of us can step   up and become a defender of the family.

—Karee Brown, Stance


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